10 Ways to See What a Good Life Looks Like Without All the Noise

As recently as the 1980’s, many Americans watched nearly 4 hours of TV each day.

There was no DVR or streaming or Youtube, just a handful of channels that occasionally had something interesting to watch at a time you happened to be home.

Times have changed, right?

Not really.

One recent survey suggested the average adult now spends 3 hours a day watching TV and another 7 hours on their phones. All told, 10 hours of their day is spent in front of a screen.

Our screens have gotten smaller, our content more endless, and the algorithms smarter, but the end result is more of the same: hours and hours of our lives being lost to a passive form of consumption.

Too Much of a Good Thing

I have nothing against entertainment, and sometimes (especially those times when you’re sick or in a long flight) it is exactly what you need.

But one of the beliefs of my life, and the main message behind my writing, is that we have so much agency over how we spend our very finite time.

At the extreme, we live in an age where you could literally be entertained all the way to your grave. Boredom is on the decline, but so is effort and attention.

Whether or not this is a good thing depends on your definition. If your highest value is the maximization of pleasure, then maybe it’s great. But if you’re like me, you believe there is more to a good life than just feeling good and avoiding pain.

There is satisfaction in straining towards your goals, too. There is meaning to be found in creating and serving others. There is an indescribable beauty to be uncovered in the natural world.

A powerful part of being human is that you get to decide what you value.

If you don’t like the way your screen time reflects your values, you can decide to change. You can, in an instant, decide to invest more of your time and energy into other “good life” pursuits, and less in the ones that leave you feeling unstretched and unfulfilled.

Below I’ve listed out some of my favorite ways to spend time. These activities are wasted in the world of endless scrolling, but when done with intention, they make my life profoundly more meaningful.

I hope they inspire you to think about what brings you a lasting sense of happy human flourishing.

Create something from nothing & share it with someone else.

At the top of my list is the act of creation. In my case, the thing I’m making is usually an essay or blog post, but it might as well be a meal or a piece of art or some music. It doesn’t matter. Taking an idea and turning it into something tangible is wildly gratifying. And then, if you’re brave enough, share your creation with the world. There is even more joy in being generous with what you’ve made.

Move your body in a way that makes you feel alive.

No matter how old or young you feel, your body will never be better than it is right now. It’s easy to lose track of the fact that each day with a healthy body is a massive gift. Treat it that way. Use your body now, and push it just a little beyond what feels easy. A well-used body sleeps better, has more energy, and is more resilient to life’s stresses.

Learn something you’re curious about.

Not all news is worth knowing, and not all information is worth seeking out. I believe that being too up to date with every new development in the world is a distraction from the really important knowledge. The world is a big place, and there is so much of it waiting to be understood at a much deeper level. Decide what you’ll devote your brain to and follow that curiosity wherever it leads.

Serve others with real, tangible support.

All of us need each other in ways big and small. I think back with fondness about all the times someone surprised me with a thoughtful act of service. I think there’s too much individualism in the modern world, people are quick to hire out work for someone else to do, but slow to help their neighbors. To me, this is an enormous opportunity to be countercultural.

Read to acquire knowledge or just for pure pleasure.

The more I learn about ordinary people who changed the direction of their lives or went on to do great things, the more I see one commonality: they read a lot as a kid and continued reading into adulthood. Reading is a superpower of sorts. The ability to acquire and retain useful information is available freely in most public libraries. And it’s enjoyable too.

Practice something that humbles you by its difficulty.

At the risk of sounding out of touch, I think we’re all a little too comfortable these days. We’re comfortable financially, and we’re even more comfortable physically. I can’t say I wish this to change, but I do think you can miss out on the satisfaction that comes from other forms of achievement. Pick up a hobby that makes you sweat, or humbles you with its difficulty. It’ll make you feel deeply alive again.

Work towards a goal that stretches you.

One of the biggest benefits of my blogging hobby is that I’ve been able to set, and reach, many of my goals. I remember when 1,000 page views in a day seemed like a big number, but I reached it. Then I set my sights on 10k and then 100k and so on. There’s something magical about the compounding of your efforts and seeing your hard work eventually pay off. I recommend everyone to be working towards a big goal.

Talk to someone you love deeply.

Speaking of achievements, I’m proud that I’ve been able to build a thriving marriage and raise three great kids into their teenage years. It’s a lot of work, but also so much joy. But familial relationships are not the only ones that matter. I have great friends and active mentors in my life that I rely on too. When I think about thriving, I think about all the people I get to share my life with.

Wonder at something that can’t be explained or easily understood.

Life is not all goals and accomplishments, and it definitely isn’t just about pleasure. Some of the best feelings that I get come from those strange moments of awe when I am overcome by a sense that I don’t understand at all what’s going on in this world, but it’s beautiful and majestic anyway. This often happens when I’m in nature, or it could be when I’m daydreaming. A thriving life has to make room for these experiences too.