Created by Mike Donghia. Subscribe to our blog for free daily updates.
If you’ve been following us here at This Evergreen Home for a while, you know that we talk a lot about decluttering our home and living with less.
Maybe you’ve even become quite successful at decluttering your own home and if you have, you’ve likely seen the peace that results from owning fewer things and having less to manage.
The words “minimalism” and “decluttering” have become such trendy terms over the past few years, sending the message (especially on social media) that if you get rid of a multitude of things from your home that are longer needed or useful, you’ll be happier and healthier.
But here’s the thing– decluttering your home is a temporary fix that may alleviate overwhelm for a time, until the clutter (and stress) come piling back up. I believe the real gain comes from not only decluttering our homes and physical possessions, but decluttering our souls too.
Have you ever thought about what kind of mental clutter has built up inside of you? I’m talking about the clutter that weighs you down physically, emotionally, and spiritually.
For me, this takes the form of anxiety and letting go of control. For others it may be feeling stressed, burdened by relationships, or generally overwhelmed with life.
We all desire to become the healthiest version of ourselves, but sometimes we’re buried beneath the internal clutter that prevents us from pursuing meaningful habits and life changes.
Of course I’m not a medical doctor and can only write from my own perspective and insights, but I’d invite you to consider what mental clutter you carry with you and as you continue to read this post, think about what you can do today to make more healthy habits going forward.
The mental clutter you carry
When we consider the word “clutter”, most of us think about the physical mess we’re left with if we neglect to put things back in their homes.
Piles of clothes that never made it to the closet. Dozens of kids’ toys strewn through every room of the house. Loose papers lining the kitchen table. Even decorative items that fill every inch of counter or wall space.
But I’d argue that the kind of clutter that takes up the most space in our lives is the clutter in our souls. This clutter could be a host of different things…
Regrets from the past.
Unhealthy relationships.
Comparing ourselves to those around us.
Judgements from others that make us feel defeated.
Stories we tell ourselves to cope with the challenges of life.
Unregulated emotions that occur as the result of the stresses of life.
Too many tasks in our day that leave us feeling overwhelmed and stressed.
Over the past several years that I’ve worked to sort out my own mental clutter, I’ve seen valuable ways to combat these emotions– ways that have allowed me to dig deeper and identify what this clutter is, where it’s coming from, and healthy ways to move forward on my journey.
Here are 6 ways that I’ve learned how to declutter my soul and live with more simplicity and alignment to what matters most. I hope you find them helpful as you think about ways in which your soul may need some decluttering as well.
“Clutter is not just physical stuff. It’s old ideas, toxic relationships and bad habits. It’s anything that does not support your better self.”
— Eleanor Brown
Ways to Declutter Your Soul
- Make time to be still.
A habit I’ve been diligent to keep since having our first baby is my morning quiet time. I’ve realized how important it is to have this hour of quietness to myself before the day begins. It allows me to start my day off with a clear focus, as I sit and pray, read, and prepare myself for the day ahead.
Finding that time of day that is undistracting to meditate, pray, journal, or even take a break and relax is one of the healthiest ways I’ve found to clear mental clutter. Quiet time lowers your blood pressure, decreases your heart rate, and increases our awareness of what matters most.
- Limit social media.
Too much consumption of social media can create feelings of comparison and self-doubt, leaving us discontent with who we are or what we have. Taking an occasional break from social media is a way to take a healthy step back from passively watching the lives of others.
I’ve taken regular breaks from Instagram every few months and this allows me to have more realistic expectations with goals, relationships, motherhood, and other important areas of life.
If social media causes you to compare yourself to others in an unhealthy way or leaves you feeling defeated after scrolling, I’d encourage you to take a break for a time and consider the people or accounts you follow.
- Decide once.
Did you know that the average adult makes more than 35,000 decisions every day? Decision fatigue can cause stress and anxiety as we waffle back and forth trying to make the perfect choice.
Something I’m still learning, but have made great strides in, is this– when you make a decision stick with it. An okay decision with firm resolve is much more powerful than a great decision that you are wishy-washy about. Just decide and don’t look back unless the facts on the ground change significantly.
- Set boundaries.
When we allow unhealthy relationships, busy schedules, or negative thoughts to weigh down our souls, it leaves us feeling exhausted. Learn to say no even to good opportunities so that you can be free to say yes to things that are truly important. I recently had to say no to an opportunity that although would have been enjoyable, it might have resulted in a great deal of overwhelm. Once I decided, I didn’t look back but felt freed from this decision and confident that it was the right move.
Leaving margin in our weeks has been one of the most helpful habits that we’ve found in this full season of life. We’ve committed to less, but still have plenty of space to serve in ways that matter.
Similarly, set up an emotional boundary from relationships that cause stress or anxiety. Surround yourself with a base of friends and family that add encouragement to your life and if possible, limit the interactions with those who bring you down.
- Ask for help.
We can’t do everything and expect to do everything well. We each have our limitations and capacity to take on so much.
Humans thrive when we live in community with one another. When we ask for help from people we trust (a spouse, family member, coworker, friend), we not only allow that person to carry some of our burdens, but also encourages us to be more generous as we see how beneficial help from others can be.
- Start small.
Mike and I have learned (sometimes the hard way) that when we want to make a life change, starting small is the best course of action. Starting small skips over the need for a perfect plan, because it enables you to learn as you go.
For example, you want to start exercising on a regular basis but have never stuck with a plan for more than a few weeks. When you start small, you make the habit too easy not to do. Instead of jumping right into a half marathon running plan that may leave you discouraged (or injured), start much smaller. I’m talking embarrassingly small…
Run for 1 minute on day 1.
2 minutes on day 2.
3 minutes on day 3.
And so on, until the habit becomes attainable, realistic, and even enjoyable. Don’t set out to make gigantic lifestyle changes all at once. Start with a few healthy choices and master those by making them so easy that you can’t not do them. Find what you can stick with in the long run and I guarantee you’ll have much more success.
Declutter Your Life, Not Just Your Home
Are you looking for a way to clear out both the mental and physical clutter that holds you back from living with less overwhelm and more simplicity?
The real magic of decluttering isn’t just getting rid of the excess “stuff” around our homes, but clearing out the commotion that fills our lives with distractions, stress, debt, and unhealthy emotions.
Our newest project, called Declutter Your Life, provides you with opportunities to target 12 key areas of clutter that commonly cause the most stress in our lives. Decluttering your life is a way to make space for the things that really matter. We’d love to have you join us! You can read all about this monthly newsletter here.
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