Why You Should Decide Once (And Stick With It)

One of the biggest struggles for overthinkers like myself is that we make a decision and then constantly revisit that decision over and over again in our head.

This is counterproductive, of course, because it causes emotional frustration, increases self-doubt, and keeps you from taking action— which is the one source of feedback that is better than all the others.

So why do we do it to ourselves?

For one thing, we’re afraid of making the wrong choice. The perfectionist inside all of us wants to get things right the first time, and we think that with enough upfront planning we can eliminate all risk. 

Another reason is habit. It’s just something we let our minds do when we’re not occupied by something else. We ruminate and ponder and re-hash the same problem from another angle. There’s certainly a time and place for this, but for most decisions in life, it’s far better to just decide once and stick with it.

Let me explain more.

The Benefits of Deciding Once

For 99% of the decisions that you’ll make in life, the first five minutes you stop and think about it will yield most of your insight. Each time you revisit the question after that, you probably aren’t adding much in the way of clarity. In fact, you’re probably making things less clear.

You might feel your thinking is productive, because you keep having new thoughts, but in truth, you are probably analyzing factors that matter significantly less than the ones that initially came to mind.

If you really need it, there’s one type of extra help that does add value, and that’s asking a close friend for any thoughts they have. This ensures that you’re not missing anything huge because of personal blind spots or biases you might have.

After you’ve done this amount of due diligence, it’s time to make a decision and stick with it. The key to deciding once is to not revisit the question/problem until you have actually made real progress and have accrued some meaningful real world feedback that might cause you to adjust course.

In summary, you don’t revisit the decision until there are a completely new set of primary source facts to analyze. At that point, you will already have some momentum, and your new analysis will not simply be a form of procrastination or fear. 

Keep reading for some practical areas to apply the decide once rule.

Areas to Practice Deciding Once

Except for the very biggest and most irreversible decision in life, you can apply the decide once rule anywhere. Here’s a list of areas in my own life where I’m seeking to live out this personal policy and have already enjoyed some of the benefits of being more decisive.

• Create a list when you go grocery shopping and only buy what’s on the list.
• Write down 3 things you want to get done each day and don’t work on anything else until they’re finished.
• Set a screen time limit on your phone and don’t let yourself change it for at least 6 months
• Make a budget at the start of each month and enforce it 100%. Make adjustments in subsequent months, if needed.
• Commit to an exercise program at the start of each week, and stick to that plan without excuses. 
• For items you purchase regularly, pick a brand that you like and fits your budget, and buy the same one every time.
• Design a morning and evening routine for yourself, so that these crucial parts of your day have a good, healthy structure.
• Pick a single hobby that you want to go deep on for the next year instead of bouncing around to whatever catches your interest.
• Anytime you have the slightest inkling to do something kind, thoughtful, or generous— stick with that decision and don’t talk yourself out of it.
• Decide the goals you want to pursue for the next year and then stick with those unless your personal situation drastically changes.
• Create a weekly or bi-weekly meal plan and don’t deviate from that schedule except when planned several days in advance.
• Pick a style and stick with it for a few years— whether that be in clothing, home decor, or music that you listen to. Not every area of your life should be in constant flux.
• Create a few rules of thumb for common decision points in your life and then let your decisions flow automatically from these criteria.
• Instead of looking to add new things to your life, decide to better maintain or go deeper with what you already have, at least for a period of time.